Our wedding days!
A week of wonderful celebrations.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
July 16th, 2008
We attend agency orientation at a firehouse in Apache Junction. Same representative from social service provider meeting facilitates. (Which he does not normally do.) At one point he talks about the struggles he has had with one of his adopted sons. We both carry that story and talk about the nature of true parenting.
Spring 2008
Katie attends a social service coalition in which a representative from the agency gives a brief presentation.
Painting our Family Tree
Last night, weeks after painting the stark white trunk and branches, I finally began adding warm brown details onto the Aspen tree in southeast corner of our bedroom. It was wonderful to watch the tree begin to take life. It was only due to my responsible and loving wife that I managed to put down the paint and go to sleep. I could have spent the night adding lines and details. I had forgotten how much I love working with tiny brushes on large canvasses.
We originally put the tree on the wall to combat the homesickness we each feel from time to time. I know that as a married couple, we are supposed to be thrilled with where we currently are and constantly refer to it as "our home." We are thrilled with Az. We truly love the city (cities to be honest) we live in, but neither of us have been released from the hold of the natural beauty surrounding our childhood homes.
So, when the aspen is complete, we will be adding a maple tree to the west wall.
The arms and fingers of the tree had me thinking of "Rock-a-bye baby in the the treetops" and the todlers asleep in makeshift hammocks in Nic. I thougth about painting a room for a child (and about never, never leaving a baby asleep unattended in a treetop). Yes, we will be those Waldork parents who make sure their childs' room is properly and softly lazured, but I also hope we will allow our children to interact with their space and build there own castle. My mind continued to how one creates a room that a young teenager can claim as home without feeling the need to add posters and christmas lights.
This week we have to fill out our formal "pre-intake packet" with the agency. We have to do it this week so that the orientation we attended last year is still valid. I've had the packet for two weeks, Len has looked through it. I haven't yet.
Yes, I'm procrastinating. It's purely out of fear. Have you ever filled out a job, college, passport application? It's terrifiying. Could my bad handwritting and dyslexia make some reviewer cringe and decide I'm not fit to parent? What if I get the answers wrong? Which of us is applicant A, which is applicant B?
It feels like the first test in the process and I know the process will be full of tests and emotional turbulence. Those of you who helped me through the adoption of Grumio (my chihuahua) know that I do not do well with "choosing" the one . . . haha, I think at times in my life that could be said for ALOT of things . . .
That said, bio families don't have to write down what age, gender, ethnicty their ideal child would be. I'm afraid that if we answer with "any" a reviewer won't take us seriously. They won't understand that we know don't want to limit the child that needs us from finding our home.
I almost envy a certain family member for his lack of "accidentially" producing children. Nobody gave him a test to fill out beforehand.
Maybe I just need to think of this packet as some form of procreation! It's like the "magical night of conception." Or maybe that was the orientation last summer? It's was nighttime, it was hot (we live in the desert, it's always hot), and it was at a fire station.
That counts as a steamy story!
Right?
*this post was an attempt to mimic the overly emotional and simpering tone of nostalgic and reflective entries seen in a typical MHwB. The "build there own castle" makes me want to gag. I made a point to end on an ill-fitting up note. The only thing I didn't mention was our prayers for a child. They're there, I just didn't feeling like disclosing them . . . I'll have to work on that.
We originally put the tree on the wall to combat the homesickness we each feel from time to time. I know that as a married couple, we are supposed to be thrilled with where we currently are and constantly refer to it as "our home." We are thrilled with Az. We truly love the city (cities to be honest) we live in, but neither of us have been released from the hold of the natural beauty surrounding our childhood homes.
So, when the aspen is complete, we will be adding a maple tree to the west wall.
The arms and fingers of the tree had me thinking of "Rock-a-bye baby in the the treetops" and the todlers asleep in makeshift hammocks in Nic. I thougth about painting a room for a child (and about never, never leaving a baby asleep unattended in a treetop). Yes, we will be those Waldork parents who make sure their childs' room is properly and softly lazured, but I also hope we will allow our children to interact with their space and build there own castle. My mind continued to how one creates a room that a young teenager can claim as home without feeling the need to add posters and christmas lights.
***
My teenage bedroom was covered in Christmas lights and posters and the random doodles and notes from friends (thanks for letting me write on my walls, mom). I don't know how our landlord would feel about that.***
So many things to think about. This week we have to fill out our formal "pre-intake packet" with the agency. We have to do it this week so that the orientation we attended last year is still valid. I've had the packet for two weeks, Len has looked through it. I haven't yet.
Yes, I'm procrastinating. It's purely out of fear. Have you ever filled out a job, college, passport application? It's terrifiying. Could my bad handwritting and dyslexia make some reviewer cringe and decide I'm not fit to parent? What if I get the answers wrong? Which of us is applicant A, which is applicant B?
It feels like the first test in the process and I know the process will be full of tests and emotional turbulence. Those of you who helped me through the adoption of Grumio (my chihuahua) know that I do not do well with "choosing" the one . . . haha, I think at times in my life that could be said for ALOT of things . . .
That said, bio families don't have to write down what age, gender, ethnicty their ideal child would be. I'm afraid that if we answer with "any" a reviewer won't take us seriously. They won't understand that we know don't want to limit the child that needs us from finding our home.
I almost envy a certain family member for his lack of "accidentially" producing children. Nobody gave him a test to fill out beforehand.
Maybe I just need to think of this packet as some form of procreation! It's like the "magical night of conception." Or maybe that was the orientation last summer? It's was nighttime, it was hot (we live in the desert, it's always hot), and it was at a fire station.
That counts as a steamy story!
Right?
*this post was an attempt to mimic the overly emotional and simpering tone of nostalgic and reflective entries seen in a typical MHwB. The "build there own castle" makes me want to gag. I made a point to end on an ill-fitting up note. The only thing I didn't mention was our prayers for a child. They're there, I just didn't feeling like disclosing them . . . I'll have to work on that.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
This blog.
I would like this blog to follow the formula of the MHwB (Mormon Housewife Blog), as close as possible. These women seem to find great comfort in their blogs and be fulfilled by the writing of them, so I will aim for the same.
I've already broken one rule- my first blog wasn't titled "Welcome!!!" or "Our First Entry!!" or "Welcome Home ______!" (with the _____ being the name of family's first child). The entry didn't outline who we are or how happy we are to have you reading our blog. I may write that entry someday. I tend to worry about rules I've broken, I always have to go back and do them right.
I will try to stay on track with the other tenants:
(SHIT! Forgot to have kids!)
(AH! NO SWEARING! ugh . . . already, this isn't going well.)
I've already broken one rule- my first blog wasn't titled "Welcome!!!" or "Our First Entry!!" or "Welcome Home ______!" (with the _____ being the name of family's first child). The entry didn't outline who we are or how happy we are to have you reading our blog. I may write that entry someday. I tend to worry about rules I've broken, I always have to go back and do them right.
I will try to stay on track with the other tenants:
- Have you noticed the creepy "We" speak I've been using? It seems to be essential for a good MHwB to arbitrarily go back and forth between the "we" and "our" of the couple's voice, the "we" and "our" of the bigger family(not that big, "family" is still just the people who physically live in the house and are either married or derivatives of said marriage), and the "I" of the Mormon Housewife herself.
- I have posted a picture of our wedding day, being affectionate, but not two affectionate, and showing off that the bride (in our case plural) made an effort to maintain modesty in the selection of our wedding gowns. I think this picture is also to prove that their is another adult in the family and the adults are actually married. Oh yes, AND that they are delighted to be married to one another. All of this is true for us, 10 points!
- Use exclamation points when praising any member of the family including oneself. Got that one down!
- When children arrive, post their pictures individually in the side bar. List their names and ages. If they happen to die, list deceased child as "Our Angel Baby" or "Our Angel Son" list their age as if they have not passed.
- Make a list of links of your friends MHWBs. These should be close friends that you go to church with. (This one is going to be a tough one for us, the only other UU families we know are . . . I'll find something that fits the bill).
- Update the blog weekly at least.
- Make big announcements on the blog like "We're moving!" and "He's Getting his Liver Removed!" Reserve title "Big Announcement" for entries proclaiming your latest pregnancy.
- Frequently use onomatopoeic words and (what I think of as) comic book sounds. "Ack!" " Zoom!" and "Cuckoo" are all good options.
- Mention your religious beliefs in a box on the side bar.
- Use pictures in almost every post. (Oh no! This one will be a real challenge. No reliable camera to transfer current pictures to computer. Do cellphone pictures count?)
- Consider basic grammatic rules a suggestion develop one's own style, consisting primarily of inconsistent narrator and subject verb disagreement. Punctuation is too be used as timing cues for those who will read your blog out loud. Pronouns and nouns need not agree. And homonyms are completely interchangable.
- Every few months write a deep personal disclosure entry. Something titled along the lines of "I'm Feeling Lonely Today" or "Thinking" should do the trick.
(SHIT! Forgot to have kids!)
(AH! NO SWEARING! ugh . . . already, this isn't going well.)
Why I'm here.
For the past year and half or so, I've been fascinated by what I've come to think of as "The Mormon Housewife Blogosphere." (This is to say nothing derogatory of Mormons, it is only that my path to discovering housewife blogs began with a Mormon family and therefore the linked blogs I read are always also of the LDS religious persuasion.)
Distracting myself from work, I hop onto the blog of a former coworker's sister, get updates on her family and kids, learn about the renewal of her faith brought in the form of a digital scrap booking class she taught at her church, her children's new vocabulary, and her husband's new schedule in medical school. No, I've never met this family. I never even really got along with the former coworker. But this one mommy blog has change my life. OK, not really, but I have put a significant amount of time into reading and analyzing it.
About a month after reading this first Mormon housewife blog, I discovered a list of links on the sidebar titled "Our Friends." This opened a whole new world of vicarious domestic bliss.
Yes, I think I read these blogs because I am jealous and wish Len or I could be a stay at home mom. Yes, I do think derisive thoughts about these families and their willingness to post things like "Potty training mishaps! :) !!!" and "Why I Love My Women's Group." But, I also really respect something about these women. I think it has to do with their love and devotion to their families, their husbands, and god. I think that atypical families have the same devotions, but our blogs are all about cloth diapering and upcycle crafting. The Mormon housewives have discovered a way to make the blogosphere their bitch. Each cheery, cuss-less, exclamation-pointed entry shouts "I am the matriarch. I know this family. I protect this family," from women who appear to live without feminism.
Lately a few entries have popped up in the Mormon Housewife Blogosphere about "neo-feminism," "christian-feminism," and "house-wife feminism." I think these women know what power they have and they are using it how they choose to.
In honor of them, I start my own version of a Mormon Housewife Blog.
Distracting myself from work, I hop onto the blog of a former coworker's sister, get updates on her family and kids, learn about the renewal of her faith brought in the form of a digital scrap booking class she taught at her church, her children's new vocabulary, and her husband's new schedule in medical school. No, I've never met this family. I never even really got along with the former coworker. But this one mommy blog has change my life. OK, not really, but I have put a significant amount of time into reading and analyzing it.
About a month after reading this first Mormon housewife blog, I discovered a list of links on the sidebar titled "Our Friends." This opened a whole new world of vicarious domestic bliss.
Yes, I think I read these blogs because I am jealous and wish Len or I could be a stay at home mom. Yes, I do think derisive thoughts about these families and their willingness to post things like "Potty training mishaps! :) !!!" and "Why I Love My Women's Group." But, I also really respect something about these women. I think it has to do with their love and devotion to their families, their husbands, and god. I think that atypical families have the same devotions, but our blogs are all about cloth diapering and upcycle crafting. The Mormon housewives have discovered a way to make the blogosphere their bitch. Each cheery, cuss-less, exclamation-pointed entry shouts "I am the matriarch. I know this family. I protect this family," from women who appear to live without feminism.
Lately a few entries have popped up in the Mormon Housewife Blogosphere about "neo-feminism," "christian-feminism," and "house-wife feminism." I think these women know what power they have and they are using it how they choose to.
In honor of them, I start my own version of a Mormon Housewife Blog.
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